Controversy rages at AGM......
..... as Saint announces that there's no draft lager, only cans. Well to be fair, controversy is perhaps a bit strong. Brooksy was heard to say, "Oh really, no draft? Better have a can then", and that was pretty much it on the controversial stuff.
The AGM on the 9th of December 2011, was fairly well attended (in a relative sort of way) and expertly chaired by the venerable and unfathomably reverend Mr Michael Stevens, whose Chairman's report was dominated by the message that we were all going to be interminably damned unless we started playing cricket on a Sunday. This was one of the many conclusions presented by the Chair from the cross party, cross bench,cross team, independent, judicial inquiry, otherwise known as the Keeping report. Contrary to the majority of attendees thoughts, this had nothing to do with the relative merits of Sam Rolfe, Phil Brooks, Dave Wood, Matt Donnelly and occasionally Dave "I think I may have just broken my [insert bone/joint of choice] so am off to hospital" Moander Maunder and Doug "I have just broken my [insert bone of choice] but will carry on and continue taking fractures for the team" McIndoe. It was in fact a report prepared by "Lord Keeping" to look at ways of attracting new players and keeping (you see what I did there) existing ones, with a view to the club's longer term survival. It was resolved that the committee, once elected, would examine the report in more detail with a view to implementing its recommendations in due course.
The Chair went on to thank the attendees for .......... well ......... attending, Brezza for taking over the reins and turning the 1sts season around, and in particular John Rolfe for putting the needs of the 2nds ahead of the needs of his wife!
The Chair then handed over to the Treasurer, the venerable and unfathomably prudent Mr Mike Stevens, whose report indicated that we were all going to be interminably damned if we didn't start paying our match fees. He then presented the club's accounts which were about to be passed on the nod when Dan Strange noticed an anomaly. The Treasurer acknowledged Mr Strange's comments, gave them due consideration and then responded by saying that any more smart arsed comments like that would result in us waiting until Mr Strange had left the premises and unanimously electing him to the post of Treasurer in absentia.
He then thanked Saint for a marvelous effort running the bar, and in particular, John Rolfe for registering the majority of the population of South Bucks, thus further boosting bar profits.
This led on to a discussion regarding junior cricket (given the parent's contribution to said bar profits), led by the venerable and unfathomably child friendly Mr M Stevens, during which the success of Friday junior cricket was acknowledged by all and a discussion, prompted by Mr D Strange regarding CRB checks ensued. The Chair gave considerable thought to Mr Strange's comments and then responded by saying that any more smart arsed comments like that would result in us waiting until Mr Strange had left the premises and unanimously electing him to the post of Child Protection Officer in absentia.
Mr Stevens went on to thank Shak(e)y and his fellow junior coaches for their fantastic work during the season, and in particular John Rolfe for producing two sons who had played for the club thus proving that he did not spend every waking minute phoning Jolly to try and get him to bat at 13 for the 2s and that youth policies do actually work.
We then headed to the Hustings for the exciting part of the evening. The Chair, Treasurer, Bar Manager and Social Secretary were all prepared to continue and were unanimously re-elected unopposed, however after the universally acknowledged prowess of the Keeping report, Lord Keeping will be busy solving the world's financial crisis next year, so stood down as Secretary to be replaced by Ian Murdoch. The meeting urged Brezza to continue with the job of Club Cricket Captain and 1st team Captain, and his choice of vice captain, Jamie Stevens, was unanimously approved. There then ensued a heated debate about the second team captaincy, with Taggart making a cogent and well argued case for the job which ran along the lines of "If absolutely no-one else will do it, I will" which immediately got him the job. At this point, Mr D Strange pointed out that we needed to give the league a name for 2nd team vice captain, and as long as he didn't have to do anything, he was happy for this name to be his. The Chair gave this proposal balanced consideration and then responded by saying that any more smart arsed comments like that would result in us waiting until Mr Strange had left the premises and unanimously electing him to the post of 2nd team skipper in absentia.
The argument was swung however when Shak(e)y announced in an accent that made Mel Gibson sound like Sean Connery's brother, "U'll no play fur wan Scotsman, but U'll play fur too" and as Smartphones abounded and Google translator went into meltdown, Doug McIndoe was elected in the confusion, thus ensuring at least one top tea next season.
The club's new captain then delivered his address, an impassioned and committed piece which summed up a seemingly new era of positivity in the club, and if the players respond with half of Brezza and Jamie's commitment, then 2012 looks like being a good season.
After a couple of items of other business, including the announcement of a fabulous new website, the venerable and unfathomably not staying for the quiz Mr Stevens thanked everyone for their contribution, and in particular, John Rolfe for ............. something. He then called the meeting to a close and we all hung around until Dan Strange had left and unanimously elected him to all committee posts in absentia.
2nds confirmed as relegated
The league have confirmed that Bledlow Ridge 2s will play in Cherwell League 7 next season, despite finishing one place above the relegation zone in 2011. A new club has entered the league, and as is normal, will be slotted into division 5, thus forcing 2 teams in 5,6,7 etc. to be relegated. This is a repeat of what happened to the 2s last year and the club considered an appeal, however the likely answer was always going to be "Stop finishing 9th and it won't affect you", so it's off to Didcot, Aston Rowant and of course Bledlow next season.